Budgie woman

As we walked along the South Bank on Friday we passed a small woman seated upon a folding chair, with, in front of her, a tiny table with two budgies -one yellow, one green - perched upon a tiny bird rest with behind them a small tray full of folded differently coloured pieces of paper. The children were attracted by the budgies and I have to admit so was I. My first budgie was green, called Nutmeg, and I have often dreamed of getting another budgie myself, a little boy budgie, to whom I would teach the words of ancient philosophers......Anyway, there was a woman and two budgies so we threaded a way through the crowds, not helped by the large pink balloon my daughter had strapped to her wrist which kept on banging into people (they mostly took it in good part), to enquire what she was selling. It was horoscopes. For a donation (amount unspecified) you could choose one of the budgies to grab one of the papers for you, chuck it on the tray, and that was that. We had to do it of course. First my daughter chose Jenny (the yellow bird) to select, and then my son chose the other one (I thought it was Joan, my daughter thought it was Joel) and he got his horoscope. I crossed the dames hand with silver (actually a pound coin - does any other coin actually have any value in London?) and we stepped away to read the horoscopes. They were amazing! They were hilarious! They were such that I wanted one too, and we turned back to the lady only to find that she had gone!

Yes, but a few minutes passed and she, her chair, her budgies, her table, her horoscopes were all vanished. We searched up and down the South Bank seeking any trace of her but there were none! This was all the more odd as our initial laughing about the horoscopes had attracted attention and surely this had meant more customers for her...but no...like a mysterious, fairy tale creature she had dispensed her wisdom and disappeared into the rather overcast day like a shadow swallowed up in darkness. Was it because I was not destined to recieve my horoscope? Was it because she was an illegal immigrant and undercover police had suddenly appeared, causing her flight? Had her budgies played up and refused to dispense any more horoscopes? Had she simply had enough? Or had she...had she....been an imaginary figure, and had spirited herself away leaving only the horoscopes as an indicator that she had ever existed?

We will never know. But I was sorry that I didn't get my horoscope. It would have been a laugh.

Here is Ben's:

Young Planet

You'll be an extremely lucky person. Soon you'll receive news from a relative to assist you.(When is soon?). You are bon (sic) under the sign of a lucky star. You'll have a long life and you'll be healthy up to the end of your life.
You'll live 90 years.

Here is Camilla's:

Young Lady Planet (how did the budgie know?????)

The heavenly gift for you will be a wealth man. (I mean what woman wouldn't want that kind of heavenly gift?) Your best friends will envy your happiness, but they won't harm you. (Always good to know) Your lucky star says: you'll live in happiness and silence, and you'll be his before marriage. (Hmmmm....a bit too much information there) You'll inherit a great wealth from an uncle . (She's going to be rolling in it). You'll marry Peter and you'll live 86 years. You'll also have babies.(not too soon I hope).